Posted in Post A Day Challenge

Jealousy and the Dildo Incident

You know how they say that some people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime? This is the story of one season of my life.

I’m not sure what it was today that sparked this memory but I suddenly felt an urge to write about my old friend The Princess (not her real name, obviously). She was such an important part of my life but we weren’t able to sustain that friendship for some reason, not the least of which was my jealousy and the dildo incident.

For the first time in my 33 years, I had moved away from my small town home. I had recently gotten divorced and desperately needed a change in scenery. I chose Jacksonville because it was the first place I got a decent job offer.  I formed a friendship with one of my coworkers right away and we started hanging out a lot during the evenings and most every weekend. Pretty much everything thing I did for a year revolved around The Princess’ custody schedule with her son. So basically, if her son wasn’t with her, we were out and about and we were always up to no good. We were living life on the edge, totally reckless and completely carefree.  Remember the part where I said I had just gotten divorced? Yeah, it was that “I’m free as a bird for the first time in my life” kind of no good.

On one of our crazy excursions, I think to an adult themed store for Fantasy Fest costumes, we had a conversation about vibrators. She seemed intrigued by one of the devices and talked about how she would never buy one of them for herself, but wouldn’t be opposed to having one. Ok, as wrong as I might have been, I took that as a hint so that when Christmas rolled around, guess what I bought my friend? And I’m not talking some cheap little AA battery required model. I dropped a big bill and she was going to need a few D batteries to get that baby cranked up.

Christmas came and went and we exchanged our gifts to each other without much discussion. She seemed appreciative and shared a few jokes but we never really talked about it again for a few months.

Sometime after the holiday season, The Princess met a guy, and she started spending a lot of time with this guy. I think she even went on to make him her Mr. Princess, but I’m not sure. Anyway, guess what happened to me when her relationship with Mr. Princess turned serious? I was kicked to the curb. I was alone. This was my fault. I’ll take the bulk of the blame, but I have to put some blame on the situation. For the previous year I had spent so much time with The Princess that I had not developed any other female friendships. None. Not a one. For this reason, when she started leaving me out, the green eyed monster began to occupy my every thought.

This time in Jacksonville was not a good time for me, mentally speaking. I had some issues that I should have been dealing with but decided to party and forget about them instead. I did a lot of “forgetting”, so what may have started as a mild form of depression and self-loathing just festered into something really dark and unreasonably foolish. My thoughts betrayed me and I began to distance myself from The Princess, both socially and at work. Fortunately, I did remain sane enough to maintain every level of professionalism that one might need to get through the work day.

I don’t remember when it happened but I think it must have been early spring. I was at home, alone, playing some silly computer game when my caller ID indicated The Princess was calling.

“Hello”

“Hey, it’s Mr. Princess and The Princess” (male and female laughter)

“Hey, what’s up and what’s so funny?”

More laughter.

“We called to tell you that The Princess will no longer need the gift you gave her,” (uncontrollable laughter by both of them) “And we’ve thrown it out for the garbage men to pick up tomorrow.”

“OK, why are you telling me this?”

More silly, giggly laughter.

“We just thought you should know.”

“Ok, bye?”

HUH?  What just happened? I was in shock. I could not speak, I could not think. I was seething with anger and crushed from the hurt all at the same time. How could she have done that? Why would she have done that? Why was it so funny to them? Had they been sitting around laughing at me and felt the need to call and ridicule me? I was so confused. That was the moment that our friendship died.

The Princess had been such an important part of my life for over a year. She became my mentor by day and my partner in crime by night. She was my confidant and my soul sister. We laughed and we partied and we sometimes even cried together. I don’t know what my life would have been like had she not been there with me during this transformation I was going through. I was like a snow covered mountain just before the first spring thaw. My time with The Princess represents the melting snow and ice as winter turned to spring. It was quick and severe and sometimes devastating but it had to happen for the seeds to grow and the flowers to bloom. I don’t have any regrets about the way that my jealousy and her dismissal of my gift ended our friendship. It was our time and it passed. We had our season and I’m okay with that.

(32/365)

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Author:

Animal lover, music junkie, wife of @danaCreative. I'm on a mission to find my authentic self. Love supporting worthy charities and causes however I can.

4 thoughts on “Jealousy and the Dildo Incident

  1. Im not not a fan of long posts, but I read thru that whole story.

    I think that a lot of females experience the thing thing that you did.
    You become besties with someone, and when they’re off with a bf. The green eyed monster comes out.

    At least you know better now and you’re okay with it =)

    Like

    1. Hi Miss Pinkles, I’m thrilled that you stuck with the story. My hubby is always giving me a hard time about my word count but I gots a lot to say so I just let er rip. Seriously, thank you for reading! It is hard to supress jealousy among friends and I’ll be the first to admit I struggle with it. Thanks so much for the comment and for letting me know I’m not alone in that.

      Like

  2. I have to admit it was your post title that hooked me in! Thank you for sharing this painful episode in your life, it can’t have been easy for you. You have written it very well and it was gripping to read. I was going to say it was a pleasure but that would have sounded wrong with it being about a painful experience for you but I’m sure you know what I mean!

    Like

    1. This story was the first I’ve written that started with a title. It’s usually the last thing I do before posting. The whole inspiration for the story was to follow the title. Thank so much for reading and commenting. And yes, I do know what you mean. There are alllll kinds of inappropriate jokes to be had here and I recognize that. 🙂

      Like

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