Last week my husband and fellow blogger, Gil Gonzalez, suggested that a group of us write about something we are passionate about and guest post on each other’s blogs for Valentine’s Day. Jeff Smith, of GetYourHeadOutOfYourAss, is the special guest blogger on my site today. I hope you enjoy reading what he’s passionate about. I know I did!
Ahhh Valentines day. The one day of the year that is dedicated to passion and love. When I was invited to write a guest blog about what I am passionate about, it left me shaking my head. Considering that I have been told that at times I am very squirrel like, running to and fro at a maddening pace, it goes without saying that I have a myriad of things that I am passionate about.
Surfing, home renovation, exercising, and kart racing are only a few of the things I have been VERY passionate about. Allow me to explain my use of the word VERY.
When I am in surfing mode, I am in the water at daybreak, walked across the street to work, and then hit the water again after work until dark, usually spending 20 hours or more in the water each week, always at the same spot at the same beach. Karting mode leads to lots of work on the kart, spending 10 hours per week meticulously setting it up for the local track that I always race at which lead to several wins and a track championship. Exercising can absorb 1-2 hours per day every day in the spare bedroom which was set up as a gym. And watch out when I start renovating a room as that is a non-stop whirlwind of activity until the job is finished.
So you might be thinking, damn, this guy is busy! No. I wrapped myself up in one of my passions so much, that I completely forgot about all of the other things I loved in life until, after doing the same thing over and over and over for months on end, I would grow bored and loose the passion. The surfboards would sit in the corner for months, until a catalyst came along and caused me to get back in the water again, starting the cycle all over. Surf, get bored, move to renovation, get bored, move to exercise, get bored, move to kart racing, get bored, move to surfing, get bored, rinse and repeat.
During all of this I learned a valuable lesson. People are not surfboards. Nor are they hammers, jump ropes, or kart engines. When you loose the passion in a relationship, you can not just put your partner in the corner, knowing that they will still be there in a few months when you are ready to pick them back up and play with them again. Yet like anything else in life, the passion that you feel for someone can fade if you don’t keep things fresh and exciting. I have a divorce to show for it.
Most relationships start out with excitement and passion, but it inevitably fades as the months go on and your life together melds into one big blob and becomes routine. Sometimes that takes years to occur, but sometimes it only takes months.
Here on Valentine’s Day, hopefully you find yourself spending time with the one you love, feeling the love and passion that is in the air on this special day for lovers. Like many couples, you may have planned something special on this day or purchased something special for each other, which brings about a certain excitement. But what about next week? Six months from now? How about 5 years from now? Will you still feel the passion and excitement?
On that note, I would like to propose a special challenge for today. Don’t just buy your partner dinner or flowers, but do something that will last beyond the indigestion and moldy water left in the vase after the flowers have perished. Make a pact with them.
Promise to each other and to yourself to work towards keeping the passion alive. Change things up. Make plans to get away for the weekend at certain times each year. Go explore something that is new to each of you. Take on a shared hobby. Play together. Have fun. Keep your passion alive!