The Light of My Life

(30 Days of Truth – Day 14 – Someone who has made your life worth living for)

I have to start this post by clarifying that today, at this moment in my life, my husband is the person who makes my life worth living for. He is my rock, my guiding angel and my absolute source of strength. He loves me and takes care of me in ways I never thought possible. However, in the days before this amazing man came into my life, there was another. That is the person I want to talk about today.

His name is Hunter Walker Love and he is and always will possess a very large piece of my heart and soul. He was born at 7:21 A.M. on December 26, 1995. It was in that moment that I understood what parents talk about when they talk about the love one feels for their own children. The problem with that is that I didn’t give birth to him, my sister did.

Christmas 2004

Hunter has been the guiding light in my life since the first moment I laid eyes on him. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on him and when I did, it was hard for anyone else to get a turn. I was so lucky to spend so much time with him in the first week of his life. I really think that was the reason I formed such a special bond with him. The thing about baby Hunter was that he formed that same bond with all the people in his life, he just loved everyone and we were all so blessed to have him in our lives.

As Hunter grew older, about 7 or 8, I had the wonderful fortune to move within walking distance to him. And boy did he take advantage of that. I can remember most Saturday and Sunday mornings I was awoken to the sound of his dirt bike jumping terraces in my front yard. He would do this until he saw my front door open. This was his not so passive way of checking to see if I was awake so he could come hang out with me.  During those years there were so many phone calls from his mama asking “is Hunter there?” that I lost count.  And yes, he was almost always ‘there’ with me.

It was during these years that I was dealing with some pretty dark personal issues and bouts of depression. I can honestly say that this little boy was the driving force in my ability to get out of bed and maintain some semblance of being normal. He was my sunshine and the single thing that brought joy to my life.  I could be at a devastating low point and hear the hum of that dirt bike flying down my driveway and it would change everything for me. He would bring light to all my dark places.

Several years ago I had the opportunity to move to Florida and it was the right thing for me to do at the time. I have to admit there has been a giant void in my heart since the day I left. I haven’t been as close to Hunter since I left Alabama but he is and always will be in my heart and my mind constantly. We talk and visit when we can and I always tell him how much I love him and that I miss him. I’m just not sure he understands how much that is. As he gets older and becomes the wonderful man I know he’s destined to be, I hope that he always remembers the special times we shared. I hope he always knows how much his Aunt leelee loves him.